spain is awkward to me
sometimes i love it
sometimes i hate it
sometimes all it takes is a walk through a park
& i am smiling
other times, all i can do is count
count the days between me & home
between me & my family
between here & there
between you & me
good news?
for your sake yes
i got to talk to my dear one meg last night
she called me...
from AFRICA!
it was brilliant
i cried
but she does not know this
i think of her Africa dwelling self often
would i be happier there?
something on my heart is pondering something bigger
something must be enlightened
something must change
i feel hope in that next week i share coffee & conversation with homeless folks
this my heart bleeds to do
i cannot wait to do something outside of myself
until then? i will:
continue searching for mantequilla de cacahuetes (peanut butter)
find a knitting store
shop at my vintage store
read my recently acquired memoir about an ex-rockstar who moved to Spain:)
ride the bus to nowhere
& continue hoping that tomorrow carries with it a lyrical hope unending
¨heartbeat, stay heavy
lovers oh please, stay on your feet for me¨
- the kooks
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1 comment:
i am just now catching up on your blog and am reading it eagerly as i would read a novel of brilliance. Cyn. I love you. I appreciate your tears. I appreciate your voice. I appreciated SO much talking with you that night. there is no doubt in my mind that you WILL find what your heart is searching for. you WILL find that bigger. I, too, am searching. and i am in africa. and you are in spain. but there is beauty in both. I am touched by you. and maybe this something big is right before our eyes. i think so.
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